Saturday, September 27, 2008
MOTHER SAID THERE'D BE DAYS LIKE THESE
Progressing exponentially. Relationship rockin'. Things developing beautifully.
And then you have a day like Friday, and you wonder why the heck you even bother.
Yep, I had one of those days, where things regress, where old issues resurface, where you feel frustrated and revert to predator, when you get extremely sore from trying to deliver a truly effective Phase 4 Yo-Yo when someone insists on crowding you but he responds with the bat of an eye and "is that all ya got?", when you wind up crying because it's not working, crying because the sunset is SOOOO heartbreakingly beautiful and that's capitalized by viewing it from the back of a horse, crying because you realize it's been exactly 104 weeks to the date (two years in weeks) since you last saw your Mother alive and coherent and you then realize that you haven't been present at all during this session, you've been back in ICU watching your Mother decline...
Yep. It was one of those days.
Maybe tomorrow will be better.